Sleep for Everyone

Sleep — or the lack of it — defines the first year of parenthood. The good news: baby sleep follows predictable patterns, and understanding those patterns gives you back some control. This lesson builds your personalized sleep plan and evolves it as baby grows.

🔄 Quick Recall: In the previous lesson, you learned about the newborn period — feeding rhythms, the 5 S’s soothing system, and what’s normal versus concerning. Now you’ll focus specifically on sleep, building on that foundation of understanding your baby’s needs.

Your Personalized Sleep Plan

Create a sleep plan for my [age] baby:

Current situation:
- Bedtime: [time]
- Wake time: [time]
- Number of naps: [number]
- How baby falls asleep now: [nursing, rocking, being held, independently]
- Biggest sleep challenge: [describe]
- Night feeds: [how many, what times]

Build a plan that includes:
1. Ideal wake windows for this age
2. A nap schedule template (flexible, not rigid)
3. A bedtime routine (15-20 minutes)
4. Age-appropriate strategy for improving sleep
5. What to expect this week vs. next month
6. Red flags that suggest a medical issue (reflux, sleep apnea, ear infection)

Sleep by Age: What to Expect

✅ Quick Check: Your 5-month-old has been awake for 3.5 hours and is rubbing their eyes frantically. Are they ready for a nap? (Answer: They’re past ready — they’re overtired. At 5 months, the wake window is about 2-2.5 hours. An overtired baby produces cortisol that makes falling asleep harder. Watch for early sleepy cues — brief eye rubs, yawning, zoning out — and start the nap routine before they reach the frantic stage.)

The Bedtime Routine

A consistent bedtime routine signals to baby’s brain that sleep is coming. Start it 15-20 minutes before target bedtime, same sequence every night.

Design a bedtime routine for my [age] baby that:
1. Takes 15-20 minutes
2. Moves from active to calm (no screens)
3. Ends with baby drowsy but awake (if age-appropriate)
4. Can be done by either parent
5. Includes a sleep phrase or cue we use consistently

Also suggest:
- Room environment (temperature, darkness, white noise)
- What to do if baby fights the routine
- How to adjust the routine as baby grows

Sample routine for a 4-month-old:

1. Bath (5 min) — warm water, calm voice
2. Massage with lotion (3 min) — gentle, slow strokes
3. Pajamas and sleep sack (2 min)
4. Feed (10 min) — in dim room, minimal stimulation
5. Book or song (2 min)
6. Into crib drowsy but awake, white noise on, say sleep phrase (“Time for sleep, sweet baby”)

Sleep Training: Your Options

Sleep training is a personal choice. Not every family needs it, and there’s no single “right” age. If you choose to try it, most pediatricians suggest waiting until 4-6 months.

I'm considering sleep training for my [age] baby. Compare these methods
for my situation:

Current sleep situation: [describe]
My comfort with crying: [low / moderate / high]
Partner agreement: [yes / no / discussing]
Baby's temperament: [easygoing / sensitive / intense]

Compare these methods for me:
1. Graduated extinction (Ferber method)
2. Chair method (Sleep Lady Shuffle)
3. Pick up/put down
4. Fading (gradual removal of sleep associations)

For each, explain: how it works, expected timeline, amount of crying,
success rate, and what kind of baby/parent it works best for.

Sleep Regressions: When Things Fall Apart

My baby is [age] and suddenly sleeping terribly after weeks of good sleep.
Help me figure out if this is a regression and what to do:

Symptoms: [describe what changed]
Duration so far: [how long]
Other changes: [teething? new skill? schedule change? illness?]

1. Is this likely a regression for this age?
2. What's causing it (developmental leap, teething, schedule issue)?
3. What should I change vs. what should I wait out?
4. How long will it typically last?
5. Should I adjust the sleep schedule?

Common regression timeline:

✅ Quick Check: Your 8-month-old stands up in the crib and cries but can’t get back down. What should you do? (Answer: Lay them back down calmly without making it a game, and practice sitting down from standing during daytime play. This is a motor milestone disrupting sleep — baby learned to pull up but hasn’t mastered getting back down. The daytime practice solves it faster than any nighttime intervention.)

Key Takeaways

• Wake windows are the most powerful sleep tool — an overtired baby sleeps worse, not better, so put baby down before they exceed their age-appropriate awake time
• A consistent 15-20 minute bedtime routine signals sleep to baby’s brain and can be started from the very first weeks
• The 4-month sleep regression is a permanent brain maturation (not a temporary setback) and often marks the point when sleep training becomes an option
• Sleep training is a personal choice with multiple valid methods — the best method is the one you can follow consistently
• Night 2 of sleep training is typically the hardest (extinction burst) — improvement usually comes by nights 3-5

Up Next

In the next lesson, you’ll build your feeding plan — from breastfeeding and formula through the exciting (and messy) introduction of solid foods around 6 months.