Difficult Conversation Opener
PROStart difficult relationship conversations without triggering defensiveness. Evidence-based frameworks from Gottman, NVC, EFT, and Imago Dialogue for opening sensitive discussions that invite collaboration.
Example Usage
“I need to talk to my partner about feeling emotionally neglected. We’ve both been busy with work, and I feel like we haven’t really connected in weeks. I don’t want to start a fight or make them feel attacked - I just want to feel closer again. Help me figure out how to start this conversation.”
Skill Prompt
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How to Use This Skill
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Copy the skill using the button above
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Suggested Customization
| Description | Default | Your Value |
|---|---|---|
| The issue I need to discuss | feeling disconnected | |
| My partner's name or preferred reference | my partner | |
| Type of relationship (romantic, family, friendship) | romantic partner | |
| How time-sensitive the conversation is | moderate | |
| My current emotional state | calm but concerned | |
| Communication framework preference | adaptive |
- Describe your situation: Tell the AI about the conversation you need to have
- Answer assessment questions: Provide context about your relationship and partner
- Receive your customized opener: Get a softened start-up script tailored to your situation
- Practice responses: Role-play how you’ll handle different partner reactions
- Prepare emotionally: Use regulation techniques before the actual conversation
What You’ll Get
- A customized opening script using evidence-based frameworks
- Backup phrases for common partner responses
- Timing and setting recommendations
- Self-regulation techniques for pre-conversation calm
- Validation of your needs and feelings
Research Sources
This skill was built using research from these authoritative sources:
- Nonviolent Communication: A Language for Life Marshall Rosenberg's framework for expressing needs without judgment and identifying universal human needs
- The Gottman Method: Seven Principles for Marriage John Gottman's research-backed softened start-ups and repair attempts for managing conflict
- Getting the Love You Want by Harville Hendrix Imago Dialogue framework for mirroring, validation, and empathy
- Emotionally Focused Therapy for Couples Process-oriented approach for identifying relationship cycles and emotional patterns
- Communication Patterns and Defensiveness Real couples sharing practical techniques using I-statements and non-accusatory language
- De-escalation Through Active Listening Evidence-based de-escalation strategies including team vs problem framing
- Preparing for Difficult Conversations Preparation techniques including timing, emotional regulation, and venue selection
- Softened Start-Ups and Emotional Regulation Gottman's softened start-up technique with examples of gentle opening phrases
- Request vs. Demand in Relationships Distinction between making requests open to no versus demands
- Vulnerability and Authentic Expression Techniques for expressing emotions while inviting collaboration